Dating Advice

Here is what I have to say about dating advice and what I have observed in my short stint on this planet:

None of it is really necessary.

Now, I am not saying I am some sort of expert. I'm not but I have still come to understand something very simple and it applies to almost all relationships I've witnessed be they fictional (movies) and non fictional (my life and the lives of people I know).

The only thing I have learned after all this observation is this: The right one for you will stay, no matter what ridiculousness is going on with you.

You don't need to follow a set of rules (unless that is what feels comfortable to you), you don't need to use certain techniques, you just need to be you in all your wonderful colorful glory.

Some advice will say, o well you overshare....But the person who is right for you may like that about you, they may appreciate the ever apparent honesty.

Some advice says, don't call until blah blah time....seriously? All that says to me when someone is, as they say, "playing it cool", is that you really aren't interested at all. And, for another thing, why in the world would you want to get yourself tangled up in a romantic mess with someone who isn't on some level so passionate and hot for you that they can barely contain their enthusiasm to contact you as soon and as often as possible?

Really, what is the point???

At the end of the day, be you, do what you feel is best. If they leave they weren't meant to stay anyways. If they come back and things work out then that was how that relationship was meant to be. If they come back and things don't work out again then there must have been some lesson the both of you were meant to learn and take with into that relationship that WILL work for you.

Just stop it with all the nonsense, you have to talk this way, use this body language, look this way, wear this thing, do things in this pattern, and blah blah blah blah blah. Just be happy and be you. The rest will fall into place as it should.

Besides, doing all that phony crap to "reel someone in" is merely surface and then you have someone falling for the fake persona you put across instead of the real you, and isn't that what we all want? To be loved, accepted, and cherished for who we really are? Flaws, Best traits, and quirks?

Of course it is, and if you're trying to sit there and say no you don't well here is what I have to say to that: You may lie to me if you wish, but you cannot lie to yourself. You know that feeling you get when you say things like "that's not meant for me" "I'm meant to be alone" or other variations thereof? That's what you need to pay attention to, because we all get that saddened lurching feeling in our chest when we tell ourselves we cannot truly be lovable.

Again, I never post without reason, I started thinking this concept over some time ago and then I was watching GIRLS last night on HBO. (SPOILER ALERT if you didn't watch) But Hannah and Adam got back together. Despite all her issues, all his issues, him rejecting her, her rejecting him, they still love each other and in fact one could venture to say that they love each other BECAUSE of those "issues" and quirks and all the good bad and ugly that comes with knowing or getting to know all the facets of a person.

I hope for that everyday...maybe I've already found it. Time will tell, but I am happy right now and that is all that I need.

That's my thought for the day. Have a good one!

No One is Perfect...

Touching on the same subject I talked about earlier but...

No One is Perfect, but I feel that it is the perceived "imperfections" that make a person beautiful and lovable in their own right. I tend to care more about a person for their imperfections quirks and flaws. They are also a major part of being a human being.

I coined a word back in 2010 and I'll use it here too: It is a wonderful thing to be "YOUnique"

You are perfect just as you are, you are the best you that has ever been. Love that about yourself and others will love that about you too :)


Happy Valentine's Day once Again!  <3

When You Love Someone...

 

I saw this today and it got me thinking. So, I did what I do best, and decided to write about it.

I am going to tackle this from two angles. Part 1: I do sort of agree with the statement, "You don't have to be nice all the time."

Why?

I agree because when you are in a mutually loving relationship you should love each other enough to not only deal with a person at their best but also stick by them when they're at their worst. That is what love is, accepting a person in all they're colorful and ecclectic glory, for no person is one dimensional and it is unrealistic to expect people to be great all the time.

Part 2: I also sort of disagree.

Why?

It's simple, when you love someone enough, you think about how your actions affect the other person before you act. Being in love doesn't always give you carte blanche to do what you feel to others. If you truly love someone you work on trying to find ways to bring them joy, not just doing what you feel just because they love you enough to deal with your nonsense and vice versa.

This one also stood out to me because it is Valentine's Day (Happy Valentine's Day by the way!) but also its a meme from a show I watch called GIRLS. Love that show. I also secretly hope those two characters work out their differences and get back together. They were weird but they were the perfect weird that fits each other. :)

Anyways, that's my stance on love, accept and cherish people for who they are. The Good, The Bad, The Sometimes Confusing, and The Ugly.

Marilyn Monroe once said, "If you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best."

Also, love one another, be considerate of how what you do affects those around you and those you love.

Happy Valentine's Day AGAIN and if no one says it to you today, I love you!

Meme Share of the Day 1/23/2013

History Repeats Itself

So we've all heard the cliche before: HISTORY REPEATS ITSELF.

Well, it really does ring true, and just yesterday I found out why.

For a long time, I felt pain over the not so positive relationship between my biological father and myself.

As it turns out, he too was harboring a similar pain, a pain that came more to light when my younger sister tracked down our Cuban grandfather. I am actually looking at his naturalization document as I type, gazing at his signature. This person is a part of me.

Things My Mama Taught Me

1. Be your own parent. No parent is perfect and if you feel something was lacking, its your job as an adult to guide yourself properly.

2. Never go somewhere uninvited. A lady never goes somewhere she is unwanted or imposes on others.

3. Never go somewhere you were invited empty handed. Its low class and you look like a moocher. Also, it shows appreciation for their hospitality.

4. Govern yourself like a lady.

5. Choose to be happy. Everything in this life begins with a choice and happiness is a CHOICE not just an effect of everything going on around you.

6. A lady knows when to leave or let go.

Spreading Happiness

Felt like this one was a good share considering my last post.

I love to see others smile, its why I such a big fan of tickles. If I can't make you laugh with my rather odd sense of humor, then I simply must tickle you!

I will tickle through protestations and frustration, but continue I shall until I see a smile on your face.

I feel better that I have finally arrived back at this point in my life where making others happy no longer makes me feel like I am being taken advantage of and it feels great to look at it from a different perspective. Now its not so much that I do for others with the hopes that I will get something in return. I look at it differently.

Now I look at it and see that just because the love I give to those around me does not get directly reciprocated, it still can be paid forward to another. Perhaps my example will inspire them to do the same for someone else, I find comfort in that.

"Be the change you wish to see in the world" - Mahatma Ghandi (1869-1948)

Be happy and share that joy with others. All I've ever wanted in this life is to do just that, share a bit of myself with another and have them do the same back.

That is my short little blurb for the day. And remember, if no one says it to you today, even if we've never met, even if I do not know your name. I love you! Have a great day and do great things! You are here to make a difference, you are here today because you matter!

Life Lessons from Will Smith

I know, surprised me too a bit, but, think about it. He's highly successful, and most folks question it, save for one: Will Smith.

If you click on the photo of Will, it will take you to a YouTube video I happened upon today. I had to watch/listen to it more than once but his words are very profound.

He was speaking on a subject that I have been exploring pretty heavily as of late, and it was really about BELIEVING what you want out of this life for yourself, your dreams, aspirations, etc.

I won't speak long on the subject but one part that stood out most -- because it was a concept I knew but somehow never fully understood -- was how can I give back or share blessings I am gifted with by the Lord or the Universe (depending on your preference of title).

The Ego

So I came across this picture the other day on Facebook and it really does speak a profound truth in the most simplest of terms. Your head will talk you out of your hearts desire but over analyzing or applying too much logic. Also, as I thought further on the subject, its not so much your head as it is your EGO. Those three lovely letters which stem from the human need of self preservation.

I believe the home of the EGO is the brain, your heart could be saying, "I really love him/her and I want to talk to them or work things out." but then the EGO takes over in your mind and says, "Well it's their fault/They need to come to me/I'm not going to talk to them first." And other variations of the "selfish" variety.

I'm a firm believer in ignoring the EGO but let's face it, I am human, and the EGO is a persuasive little coward, which in turn makes me the coward for listening to it.

However, I am also a firm believer in following what your heart tells you. It is usually my number one piece of advice I give to a friend who is stuck in the midst of indecision on a situation. Your heart will not lie to you, in fact, I believe it is a gift and our best guide in choosing what is right or what is the right path. EGO, on the other hand, is a lot like a political lobbyist, it will lie/cheat/etc to turn you towards its agenda, as if it was a separate entity that happens to be residing in the same body. That is my thought for the day.

Below, I leave yet another piece that really made me think on this and perhaps it stood out because the one below happened to contain three things I would really like to say to someone but my EGO/HEAD/FEAR/COWARDICE and whatever else could be listed simply won't let me. An excuse perhaps but...it is what it is. 

Love them Anyway...

  

  
A couple of lessons I have learned about people: 
1. Insecure people will work double time to try to make you feel just as insecure as they are, but love them anyway. 
2. A person who has no problem hurting themselves, won't have any problem hurting you, love them anyway.
3. So many people will tell you that you can't do something because they feel in themselves that they can't, keep doing you and love them anyway. 
4. The most sensitive people often have the biggest walls. I have realized walls are for cowards, open hearts are for the brave.
Welcome to Day 2 of 2013. Make the most of it, it is a page of a chapter of the book of your life. Have a good day everyone! ^_^


Paintings above: Acrylic on 9x12 Canvas 
Available as mug, magnet, and post card prints at dcurbanpixie.deviantart.com

Recognition

Never fail to recognize yourself in another person. Regardless of culture, appearance, life choices, or current circumstances. When you recognize yourself in others, you can give and share freely with others. It is why I am always thankful that when I run into a homeless or poor person on the street, I always always always have at least a dollar or more to give to them. When we give to others we give to ourselves. It does not matter what they choose to do with what is given, This life, this world, this experience, is all shared and connected. Help others, help yourself. Forgive others, forgiveness will be given to you. That is my thought for the day. :)

LOVE

Love.


I must admit every time I read it, think it, or say it, I get that light flutter right in the middle of my chest. I love it, its uplifting and warm and the sensation travels to all my extremities.

No matter how many failed relationships, heartbreaks and woes, I cannot help myself. I am in love with love.

As a result of my being enamored with the state of being, the sensation, and the thrill of being in love, I have decided to dedicate this post.