Things My Mama Taught Me

1. Be your own parent. No parent is perfect and if you feel something was lacking, its your job as an adult to guide yourself properly.

2. Never go somewhere uninvited. A lady never goes somewhere she is unwanted or imposes on others.

3. Never go somewhere you were invited empty handed. Its low class and you look like a moocher. Also, it shows appreciation for their hospitality.

4. Govern yourself like a lady.

5. Choose to be happy. Everything in this life begins with a choice and happiness is a CHOICE not just an effect of everything going on around you.

6. A lady knows when to leave or let go.


7. Even if you are breaking down inside, you always look your best on the outside. You look flawless, do everything flawlessly, and never let them know how much it hurts.

8. This is almost verbatim from one of several convos with my mother: Guard your heart. You are too sensitive and you give your heart too easily. You forgive too much and you are too nice. Protect yourself, and take your time with people.

9. When someone does you wrong, don't go back for seconds.

10. When someone tells you something, believe them. If its a threat, change your locks, change your patterns, and if necessary, get a restraining order.

11. When someone leaves, not everyone is meant to stay. People are in your life for a season, a reason, or a time. You just pick yourself up and say on to the next one.

12. If a man is not with you for the holidays, he is not your man. In all likelihood, he's probably with "his main woman" or...his wife and kids. Don't play the fool, don't play that game. (Also a lesson learned from my Uncle).
13. Stick to your standards. Do not be afraid to let someone go if they do not meet those standards. The first time you do it, I won't lie to you, it will be scary but in the long run, you are doing what is best for you.

14. Respect your elders.

15. Be considerate. Think about how you affect others, don't be selfish. I'm not raising a selfish child.

16. Never go out of the house half-steppin'. You do not go out in public not put together, I don't want to ever see you walking in public with rollers in your hair. It's low class.

17. Don't wear white after labor day, (yes I know the rules have bent on this a little but still quite the gem from my mama). I remember this one because I argued against it and my mama said this is how we do it in the south, I said I'm not from the south. She said, doesn't matter, you're raised by a southern woman.

18. Have control of your mind. I'm not having a crazy person in my house. Get it under control, get it together. No one is going to feel sorry for you.

19. Cover your *** and DOCUMENT EVERYTHING.

20. If you visit someone's house and their kitchen and bathrooms are not clean. Don't eat there.

21. Strive to be better than I was, you are like me in many ways but you can do better than I did. Be a better parent than I was.

22. Count to ten and calm down. If you need to cry, then cry. If you're frustrated, punch a pillow or a stuffed animal. Get the emotion out because it is not healthy to bottle it up inside. You'll give yourself an ulcer.

23. Stay away from doctors as much as you can, especially after a certain age. The addage "an apple a day" really does hold some truth.

24. Be independent. (One I've been taught pretty much since I could walk). What if I wasn't here tomorrow? Would you be able to take care of yourself? I need to know you will survive when I am gone.

25. Nothing has power over you unless you give it that power. Your father once told me "I am going to destroy you." What did I do? I said, only the Lord has that kind of power over me and you are not the Lord.

26. Always remember your blessings.

27. When praying for a new blessing, the proper way to pray for it is to say Thank you for this blessing. Don't beg, don't plead, and don't just simply state. You have to say "Thank you, Father, for ____" and fill in that blank.

28. Always keep a journal, when you look back you're going to want to remember those moments.

29. If you haven't used it in a year or two, get rid of it!

30. Not everyone who smiles in your face is your friend. Sometimes people only want to be around you because they feel they have something to gain from you. Sometimes they could be jealous of you, and are only using you as bait to catch the men that you don't want. Sometimes they will want to hurt you or manipulate you.

 31. Never hold on to someone who doesn't want to be held on to. Never chase. Look for the one who does and strives to be held on to.

32. Love yourself first!